Buried in Books

Well since I have nothing better to do, including sleep I have been up since 5:30am for no apparent reason.  Today was Grandpa and Grandma's last day here they went back to Saratoga, which is where I would rather be right now.  But before they left, Grandma and I went to the library to get me some books to read to occupy myself with; and to my surprise our library actually had decent books..WHICH NEVER HAPPENS!!  Usually I go home empty handed but not this time!  When we got back we had hamburgers for lunch and then the grandparents departed.  So I went up to my room and read the book i was reading and before I knew it I had finished it, so two books down with many more to come in these next few months.  To be honest I'd rather be reading books for school, and writing papers and studying then reading for fun.  After all I should be at Sacred Heart right now like a normal nineteen year-old.  I miss interacting with my friends who I barely talk to anymore because they are all busy with ooh you guessed it...School! So until then I will read for fun and attempt to find other things to do with my time besides spend $ and wish i was at school so if you have any suggestions let me know!  Now I am exhausted and am going to watch some television and pass out!
Love,
Sarah

Book #2

Books from Library

Day with the Family

Today was a day with the family, after breakfast I ran errands with Dad, Walmart, grocery store and Restaurant Depot.  Also today, we have visitors, Grandma and Grandpa came from Saratoga to visit me! Mostly because Grandma was dying to see me but it is a nice change of pace for them! It is also nice for myself because I do not remember seeing anyone at Christmas time because I was so sick.  After lunch, Mom, Grandma and I ventured out to Staples and Bed Bath and Beyond for binders, and just looking around.  Once we arrived home, we organized and redesigned the "Sarah Medical Binder," and I made myself a scrapbook binder filled with all the mail I have received, and WILL continue to receive hopefully throughout this time.  Then before we knew it Dad had prepared my all-time favorite dinner; Steak and Lobster Tails! After stuffing my face with food I can barely move and am not leaving my bed! 
Keep Reading, Following and Commenting!
Love,
Sarah

Binder with all my Cards in it 

A Day Without a Doctor!

Finally, my wish came true, a day I didn't have to wake up and get ready for a doctors appointment! So what to do with myself for the day??  Mom and I went through all my stuff from school and unpacked everything, I now have clothes back in my closet and everything organized; well for the most part.  After all the unpacking, Mom and I got ready and left the house.  We went to one of my favorite clothing stores Mandees, because it is closing and I got some really cute tops that I could wear while I'm in or out of the hospital.  From there, we went to Michael's and walked around there for a little while, and boy did it feel good getting out of the house.  When we arrived home, Dad was in the kitchen making homemade Chinese Food...YUM!! Now after that delicious dinner I am starting to settle down for bed and look forward to tomorrow when my grandparents come to visit me.
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Love,
Sarah

Torturous Morning to Fun Evening!

Last night sleeping in my own bed, with no monitors or early morning wake up calls felt amazing! Upon sleeping in my own bed i knew it was an early morning for oh you guessed it; another doctor's appointment. This morning was a quick start, tried to shower, almost fainted but made it through and off to the doctor we went! Today's doctor talked to me about blood transfusions and the long-term vision of my care.  To my dismay, I had to get blood drawn which ruined my morning, my arms are already bruised and my view is blood is blood no matter who took it, but everyone needs their own sample.   Then to make me feel better Mom and Dad let us stop at the Short Hills Mall on the way home for some Cheesecake Factory for lunch, I had popcorn shrimp which I now find to be better than Legal Seafood's, and then of course some shopping!  Short Hills just recently got Forever 21, and right next door is the Pandora store so I was in heaven! Mom and I of course shopped and Dad loved seeing the smile on my face that I was out and about since I slept through all the holidays.  To end our trip at the mall, mom and I got makeovers, so I felt like a teenager again.  Finally after being pampered, we arrived home in time for dinner, then family friends came over for a little while.  I am now happy that I do not have to see a doctor of any kind until next Monday!  Support continues to flow, flowers and cards keep arriving, and I hate to break it to everyone but I am getting used to all this mail and will be disappointed when it comes to an end.  Now after my long day I am exhausted and am plopping myself in my bed and not moving! 
Keep Reading and Commenting on my Road to Recovery
Love,
Sarah

Nordstroms and Pandora!

Makeover 

Shirt I got when I got blood taken

Homeward bound! Week 1: COMPLETE

After sleeping later this morning, I got good news that I would probably be able to be home later tonight! That made my mood up for the day, walked around the floor, even finished book number 1, I wonder how many I could read by the end. Any good recommendations? Today a social worker also came in and gave me different things to think about, even suggested making a list of goals of what I could accomplish during this time away from school. I also got my daily massage for the day. Also while I am here, for those of you who know me well know that I hate math, but lately everything has turned into a number game. The number of times I get up, to what I eat and drink, the amount of mail I love getting, to the countless amount of texts I mostly send but also receive. Support has continued and I don't know what this process would be like without it!
Keep reading and commenting!
Love,
Sarah

Book Number 1

List of Things to Accomplish

Wait and See

Last night I slept so much better and was able to enjoy today. After breakfast, Mom and I did a few laps around the floor and it felt good to see something other than my room. I got cleaned up a little and then I got a visitor from an art specialist. While she was here, I got to color two different pictures, one is of love and the other is of my favorite animal; the penguin representing my Theta Phi's that I miss like crazy! Then for a lot of the rest of the day I read and hung out with Dad so Mom could take a break at home. Results came back that the levels were a little to high to be released today, but there is always tomorrow. But on the upside here I do get a nice massage everyday and that you most definitely do not get on a college campus. If boredom is the worst part of this whole experience I think I will survive. When Mom and Greg arrived for dinner they brought me some coloring books just for a change of pace if I wanted something to do besides read. Soon however I think Mom is going to have to teach me how to knit!! All the doctors and nurses here continue to be amazing and are surprised at how well my treatment is going. To end the night I got a visit from a dog named Callie and got to pet her for a little while; that made mom happy seeing as shes allergic to dogs, oops but it was a fun night. That's it really now just relaxing with Mom, may watch a little television then turn in, with hopes of maybe going home tomorrow!
Keep reading and commenting!
Love,
Sarah

After Morning Walk

My white picture of Waddles the Penguin

Black Picture Drawing

Drawing Wall

Long Night, Relaxing Day

Look at me go, started treatment earlier than they expected, Champion Style. Or as my cuzoonie calls me, the kryptonite which she represents by a squirrel. Good thing was, my appetite is back in full force, which might have lead to my upset stomach last night. Nice thing being that the bathroom was not even a step away. This morning I was able to receive a massage which let me sleep well because I didn't sleep very well last night between the medicine and stomach. From there was very lazy, read, napped and hung out with my mom and dad. Today the caged in monkey, wanted to stay in! With last night what it was, I wanted to stick to a plain diet, chicken noodle soup and dad brought me bagels with butter! YUM!! The one thing I will never understand throughout this process is the menu of what they feed sick people, it doesn't seem appetizing at all! But one thing I will never get over is all the support from doctors here, as well as family and friends! I LOVE all the mail, emails, flowers, balloons, they really keep my spirits up during this time. Seeing as everyone knows I would kill to be at Sacred Heart with all of my friends, yes I am a dork and miss having homework, papers and tests. Another great part about today is that my kindergarten teacher and her daughter came to visit me! It was nice to catch up and rehash the days I was the determined five year old who got into trouble on rare occasion. Now it's time to wind down, the vitamin wash out began and hopefully will have a restful night. Keep reading my journey and leave comments.
Love,
Sarah

Flowers from HS guidance Counselor

My super squirrel from my cuzoonie 

Hospital menu

Menu Again

Battle Day 1

Today is the day it really begins, the day I start to beat PCNS Lymphoma. I woke up in my nice queen sized bed but then to my dismay ended the day in a twin sized hospital bed with bars, which makes me feel like a caged in monkey! But on the upside my room is huge equipped with a fridge, couch, love seat, bed for mom, bathroom with shower and plenty of room for visitors. Today they put in a port in my chest so my arms are done being tortured with needles and bruises, I will have a battle scar for proof. Another good part is that I get to wear my own clothes instead of a hospital gown that does not close. For the port I was wide awake I wanted to watch but they put a tent over my head, I mean if I'm awake at least let me see what you're up to with my body. Then when I returned I had lunch (chicken fingers and fries) and it was gone within twenty minutes, what can I say at least my appetites finally back. From there I hung out with Mom and Dad, while they waited to see if my body reached the proper level to begin treatment, they expected it to not be until tomorrow but what can I say I'm proving them wrong already. After dinner the nurses arrived saying treatment was going to begin, of course they had to start while I was attempting to watch Gossip Girl, but I am underway. I can say i am very bored but if boredom is the worst it can get I'll deal with it. That's it for today, time to sleep so I have energy to complain of my massive amounts of boredom tomorrow!
Love,
Sarah

Hospital Bed

Lunch after port got put in

Treatment began Friday January 20

Everyone at the hospital has been so amazing, and quick with wanting me to get better that treatment started already!! For those of you who don't know I have been diagnosed with CNS lymphoma, which is a curable form of brain cancer.  Treatment will consist of in and outpatient treatment over the next four months, but hey I start at 19 and will be done before my 20th birthday in May!  So on Friday, mom and i spent a few hours in the hospital and i received an IV treatment for a few hours, I did great they did not have to stop the IV at all and it took less time than expected :).  For the first time while I was there I was able to read a book, which I haven't been able to do in awhile because of my eyes.  The book I'm reading is really good actually it is called Mim Warner's Lost her Cool, and I'm sure i will be reading a lot more books in these next upcoming months! But the treatment went great, my chair was much more comfortable then moms, and while i was there they explained more of what is going to be happening next week while i am in the hospital for another form of treatment! But i will be finding things to do, Dad was nice enough to get me an iPad, because during Christmas time I didn't know what I wanted so now I figured it out, and am very thankful for it.  But in all it was a good day and I for one am so lucky they are getting everything started so quickly.
I think thats it for now, keep the mail, emails and all forms of communications flowing!

Treatment Day 1

Love Sarah <3

Thank you Everyone!!

Penguin from my Amazing Little

Bear from my Cousins <3 

My car (until i am cleared to drive an actual one!)

Bear from the Fano's

My pile of balloons!

Everybody has been amazing with all the posts on Facebook, Texts, phone calls, and sending me snail mail, emails and texts.  Even while at the hospital i had to have them change the IV because it was affecting my texting abilities! Hate to break it to them but I have to keep up my social life somehow! I just wanted to say thank you to friends, family, and my sorority sisters for everything!!

The Beginning!

Beginning of December

It all started in December, up at SHU when i wasn't feeling well at all! Took a trip to the lovely Bridgeport Hospital the first weekend in December and from there got worse!  My mom got me out of all my finals but i insisted i stay, and to my surprise i pulled off my best grades and GPA......GO ME!! My brother picked me up on December 16th for break and basically from that day until Christmas i slept and didn't appear at all. Christmas was even a nightmare I barely saw my cousins because i felt so sick with throwing up and quite the head ache! I was very confused as to why the doctor could not find anything wrong with me! First they said mono, then limes disease but i was stubborn and would not tolerate any of the medicine! Then my family noticed that my eyes were crossed ( I couldn't tell the difference but they could)! The next day i went to the eye-doctor who is the one who started getting to the bottom of what was wrong and I'm very thankful that he saw something behind my eyes! The next week all seems like a blur to me, filled with doctors appointments, tests, but i still kept my character and charm. I was admitted into Overlook Hospital in Summit NJ and they did and are continuing to take great care of me!! While in the hospital I crawled out of my cat scan, thought music was playing in the middle of the night, and don't even get me started on my bed, it had a mind of its own! But the entire time my mom, and dad were there for me, and I had some visitors as well! The one thing I will still never understand is the food they serve people in the hospital, its DISGUSTING, my dad brought me bagels, and apples and good food the entire time

Brain scan in Hospital